Showing posts with label Disability. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Disability. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Sooner Success A Failure?

Sooner Success’(found at this url http://soonersuccess.ouhsc.edu/ ), originally the way I understood the concept, formative innovative concept to help the disability community including the person and family in Oklahoma hung on the personal spin. Oklahoma would place a coordinator in every county.
Another word for this coordinator that sums up my understanding of job is a liaison or go between. When parents were stressed locating the necessary resources for their child or adult child with disabilities getting a hold of the Sooner Success County Coordinator was the end all to problems encountered by families. Whatever the community needed this person could do. Some examples might be help filling out forms, simply giving out information or helping get necessary training in the county. I thought this meant, believe I read this at one time, that the Coordinator would contact other agencies and programs or see what the hold up seemed to be. Also, I thought this meant going with parents if needed.
How many know what the Switcheroo is a con game? Now, I realize verification is best. Heck, if I had known this was coming, I would have taken down the exact specifications listed by Sooner Success. My memory is darn near close to needling past pretty good to excellent on the scales. But because I believe this agency is pulling the old bate and switch with their mission statement I can’t prove this. Sooner Success as an agency is a baby that already learned to downsize their programs to a limited amount learning the term “referral” very fast.
Here below are some other “referral” agencies or groups funded by either the state, federal or both:
Oklahoma Family Network (has been rolled up into this program somehow I think)
Oasis (which has been rolled up into this program somehow I think)
Oklahoma Autism Network
Center For Learning and Leadership
Parent Center
Disability Law Center
Possibly Disability Council?
There are other groups that act as “referral” agencies. Many that refer people provide trainings and a few other services. MY MAIN POINT IS THAT THE INDIVIDUAL PERSONAL SERVICE of being a liaison aiding the disabled community with resources while cutting through red tape disappeared in puff of smoke. I know because when trouble cropped up during an application process my phone call to the coordinator wastes my time during my efforts locating services and resources for my son with autism..
Theoretically, a county coordinator can start a job without a college degree and a salary higher than a teacher. Do any of you own a business? If you use a professional do you always seek out another to check their work? Why as a tax payer, would you want to waste this much money in duplicating services where the end produces little improvement in service to the target client? If duplication, triplification or quadruplication of agencies were cut with the a state question mandating the savings were to spent on services to the target clients in the form of therapy, transportation or things that improved quality of life in carefully worded language; would you vote for this measure? How about the same area serving elderly?
Pretend for a moment your profession is one of investigations. This time the target is School Support Services (found at this url https://www.oumedicine.com/department-of-pediatrics/department-sections/devbehav/child-study-center/programs-and-clinical-services/school-support-services) is another agency or group set up to support those with learning disabilities or developmental delays. My comprehension of this program is funding comes from both federal and state governments and Oklahoma school districts also required to pay to use the services. A number of years have elapsed since dealing with this group. Here is another url http://autismcenterok.org/ to go to if interested; I EMPHASIZE THIS IS A MUST!
Rephrasing of mission statements and websites reworked for optimal eye appeal known as marketing resulting in changes to this area have occurred since my last visit. I recollect words to the effect that a child in need or family without the resources for school support services or early autism treatment would receive treatment regardless of financial status. Agencies or groups wise up. You see I liked what I read on this site about evaluations. Insurance didn’t pay for these things back then and expensive was stamped all over the services.
I inquired of my son’s teacher at the time. Of course his teacher said she was in fear for her job. Requesting services that cost a school district money are doubtfully the way to get on the escalator to a promotion for teachers. My mind went to questioning a few things. You see my resume contains a manifold list of skills, jobs, education and volunteer areas. As a pharmacist, I am familiar with the concept of “capitation.” This process is where an insurance group, usually a health maintenance organization (HMO) pays a provider (doctor or medical group) one fee to cover the medical needs say for instance you own a business and you purchase insurance from this HMO to give medical insurance to your employees. Another form of this business arrangement is if in your business you pay one fee a year to a maintenance provider to keep all your machines like printers and computers working. If your machines never break down it is basically an insurance to keep you up and running. However, if you have multiple breakdowns the cost to you for this expense is the same.
Besides being a pharmacist, I have a Master’s of Science in Management. I taught high school for a little over a year via alternative certification. I went back to pharmacy for less hours, better benefits, needing family time to work with my son age three that had autism because insurance didn’t cover all the therapy needed, and I hate to say this loving most of the children but better working conditions overall. Volunteering expands my skills into a variety of other areas.
The only people that might provide an answer to some of the questions racing through my mind had to be the financial office of the school district. Thus, I called. “Does the district have a contract with School Support Services at OU? Plus, if the district does is it a per use cost agreement or a capitation contract?”
“Yes, our district has a contract with School Support Services that stipulates capitation as the agreement for services. I am sure you understand this but that means we pay one fee for the service and the number of uses is unlimited to be regulated only by making appointments that are reasonable. Office machine repair is commonly entered into in this manner. Did you understand what I said? Can I help you further or do you require more information or assistance?” Asked the lady on the other end of the phone at my son’s school district financial office.
“NO THANK YOU! I do appreciate your time and the information you have given me. I get what you said and need no explanation or further assistance. Again, thank you very much for your help and all the time. You have no idea how grateful I am to get this data. Have a nice day. Bye.” Chirping in a happy mood I hang up the phone.
Next, I call School Support Services. You see after my wreck in 2008 I had time to research and locate more resources for my son with autism. The school district my son went to offered plenty to him and the family for which I was thankful. The special education director advertised on Cox Cable’s Community Channel that was in existence at the time. The library had a weekly comment newsletter with events listed for people to take. One time I sat down to discuss this with him. He told me he advertises the school district’s responsibility to search out children age 3 to 21 with disabilities and provide necessary services for them after an evaluation process to se if they met qualifications for the program.
School Support Services says to contact them or your school district for services. During my call I asked, “Why don’t you list the districts you have a contract with on your website!”
This way parents will know in advance if the district is trying to side step issues with them. After the wreck a number of the programs like this one were about teaching me to write a lengthy IEP (Individual Education Program) detailing and trying to get the schools to pay for as much as possible. To a point I get this. What people do not realize is the schools have limited resources in budgets already. Another big problem is teacher’s are pushed to the max. I think it comes down to a piece of paper that means little if the teacher is trying but cannot execute the IEP or the school district for that matter.
School Support Services asked me how I found out the contract with school district’s based on capitation and much more. I told them it took a little thinking and asking key offices a few questions to get the knowledge I sought. Then I went on to say that I believed some parents gladly would pay or offer donations to supplement the balance I knew the program was leaking. Trust me I knew even with all the support from federal, state and one time fee from the school districts, costs for the program were over the total sum. Yet, as a parent I knew the cost of paying privately for this and seeing it reduced drastically was something I could appreciate. My suggestions for innovations or doing things different fell on deaf ears like every time I offer such a solution.
School Support Services is one example of many groups that like to hold the schools accountable for so many sins. In so many frames of times I have turned the tables to explore how a group can be or should be more responsible to most innocent, needy and helpless segments of our community in their outreach to provide a service to this community to be met with vile distaste for my suggestion in acceptance of any responsibility in this area.
Neither of these agencies or groups is alone in a sea of entities servicing the disabled. Disinformation or being given out right wrong info starting me down a journey on Wrong Street is an event of more than one date. Reaching out for services for my son that would provide basic housing and supports when my husband I die because there is no family or siblings for him to fall upon if he doesn’t reach the potential I think he will concluded in another fiasco of similar outcomes. Once I had my son in this program, which one must gain entrance before the age of twenty-one now due to changes in policy, the service, people and program is excellent for what the budget allows. I tried to call people to tell them but they are tired of what they perceive as anger and rhetoric.
It is late and I am tired but there is more. I will write about these another day. Yet, I have to talk about the good I found too. Martin, then an employee of the Center for Learning and Leadership found a social group, OKAY, for my son that ran by a special lady that retired now. Dee Blose allowed me to volunteer and help a group of young adults that gave me so much more than I gave. Jody Harlan, that works for Oklahoma Department Vocational and Rehabilitation Services, has been available to answer questions and on occasion advocate for me. Joni Bruce, head of Oklahoma Family Network, is owed a few thanks for things she has done helping me with agendas associated with doing right or locating resources for my son’s needs.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

The American Dream; Helping Everyone Reach For It!

**** Picture copyrights and Intellectual Property Rights Apply
AIPTEK
Scan 4
WHY ________________? 
images (1)
Seemingly bleak outlook!
—Unemployment of youth and adults with Autism, Special Needs and other labels increases over the years.
—News stories of a United States facing a crisis as the rise in the number of people in this area mature and face unemployment. This raises the costs of caring for unemployed and placing stress on a nation that already faces unemployment problems in a wavering economy.
Ideas? What can be done? Funding?
—BETTER TRAINING
—BETTTER EDUCATION
—“GOOD OLD AMERICAN KNOW HOW”
—EXAMINE PROBLEM IN LOGICAL ORDER
  >Then propose solutions
  > Methodically evaluate solutions
A few thoughts
14697793504_babff4276f_z 
SPREADING OUR WINGS INTO
BUSINESS OWNERSHIP OF ......(Leaving Ideas out because)
FUNDING (Leaving out information because)
Barriers to overcome/solve
     Social skills
—Overcoming stigma of disabled
>Standard management practices show                 increases in productivity and profits when engaging    and empowering workers.
>Maintain a culture that
**Keeps communication open
**Continues to train/update skills
                                                                      **Remembering disabled face challenges                                                                                                                                              but dislike being thought less of or                                                                    considered on the fringes of society.
     Businesses skills needed
     (Consider _________)
     Transportation
     Education/Training
     Overcoming stigma of
   disabled
Other considerations
—Peer mentoring and modeling
—Health insurance and other benefits
—Setting Parameters
—Partners (How will we proceed?)
—Research legalities and other
—Work on outline of handbook
—Liability
—Future projects (5, 10 and following years)
A STARTING POINT!
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank (my ideas are worth keeping to self for now)
A STARTING POINT!
Blank
Blank
  • FALSE IDEA DISABLED LAZY SEE PDF @ http://askearn.org/docs/brochures/pdf/FAQ_2-ACC.pdf
  “Are employees with disabilities as productive as   employees without disabilities? Yes…” See PDF.
  “Are employees with disabilities absent from work   more often? No…” See PDF.
JOIN ME IN TAKING A DIFFERENT VIEW AND WITH NEW PARTNERS
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JOIN ME IN TAKING A DIFFERENT VIEW AND WITH NEW PARTNERS
JOIN ME IN TAKING A DIFFERENT VIEW AND WITH NEW PARTNERS
JOIN ME IN TAKING A DIFFERENT VIEW AND WITH NEW PARTNERS

Friday, May 1, 2015

Obvious Trouble with Current Accepted Disability Advocacy; Pointing Out What is Wrong!

Having a disability and being able to identify this.  My son has taught me a lot about this.  It is a very touchy subject.   There is an advantage to saying I have blank.  When a person goes to Secondary Education and asking for the help that is needed means naming your disability.
Consider these things about having to say I have blank.  How many people like being singled out?  Do you want to be known for being different or having a disability?  Did you want to belong to specific groups?  How many realize the peer pressure teens with disabilitiies face?  Are called stupid or dumb for going to Lab Class for help?   Going through all these issues at or during adolescent? Recall Freak Shows at the Fair and Circues?
Many teens and people in general with a disability see themselves as being flawed.  A number of those in this population feel like naming their disability means something is wrong with them.  A few might consider themselves less than whole.
14700002802_89652ed498_z
tm wc3
This is my son Tanner Mack Adcock.  Every time I have tried to teach him about his disability and to name it; he gets upset.  He doesn't want to be known as a person with a disability.  He is adamant he doesn't have a disability. Being in an inclusive Oklahoma History, one incentive for him to do good without any accommadations is to be able to stay in the classroom and take tests or whatever. If a child or teen goes to lab for help he might be labled as Retarded.
Another issue I have with what is considered correct Disability Advocacy deals with having teens lead their IEP meetings.  This can be an awful amount of pressure for a teen.  What teenager really knows what they want to do? Would we consider letting those labeled "normal" lead a class?  Be in charge of more?  Actually when I taught high school Biology I had teens present a paper, be video taped and have the so called authority of teaching the class.  Their material was on my test. I gave them what I got.  Which was asking to go to the bathroom and such.
Please understand, I believe that the interests of the teen are paramount.  I only feel that direction of the meeting needs to be left in the hands of adults and direct the teens in having a meeting that covers all the things that should be done for him.  Trust me how many teens declare a college major and end up with that being their final degree path?  More should be expected from these teens.
How many teens with disabilities go on to be successful?  How many owe that to a parent that has pushed the teen to contiue exploriong a path?  Looking at jobs and pushing the teen to continue on in career or other?
Had I to do it over, I would been less about my son saying he has autism and more about him understanding when to ask for help.  Then I would have explained more about how some people have specific needs and identified the people like President George Washington had huge spelling problems but overcame them.  I would explain that people that have challenges need assistance and by understanding that this label may mean you can overcome this with a specific thing.
Does everybody know that a Blind person needs a cane or that a cane greatly increases his/her ability to get around? search  Do we keep telling a person that is Blind to identifiy his disability or spend more time teaching him to use a cane to get around?  How much time do we spend on teaching a person that needs a wheelchair that he has a mobility disability? search-1   Or, do we concentrate on teaching him/her to use the wheelchair to get aroud?
If I could go back and do it over; I would center my time and energy on teaching my son to grasp his needs to master challenges in life and be able to communicate that to others.  Conveying to my son the importance of being able to ask for and communicate how support is a necessity for meeting the demands of this world.   Or, somehow be more positivie in getting him to name his disabilities to be succesful in this world be where I placed my resolve with him.
I believe that being politically correct and following the trends in Disability Advocacy is less important than doing what is needed.  I failed to listen to my son in his insistent of prefering to be identified as normal or not disabled.  What I hope to convey in this post is for you to understand you the authority on your child.  Try to listen to them and find a way to do what is needed without being afraid you are doing the right or correct way.
Become confident in yourself with regard to your child.  There are no better specialists on a child than their parent or Guardian.  Please learn from my mistakes.  Instead of helping my son name his disability, I conveyed to him that he is different or that I think he there is something wrong with him.  I am sure you know this was not my intent. Raising any child is scary. Trials and life associated with raising and planning for a child with extrodinary abilities is daunting.
If you have advice to me, disagree with my slant on this or other; commenting is crucial to boost parents or those working with this population to teach them how to do this.

Monday, April 27, 2015

Obvious Trouble with Current Accepted Disability Advocacy; Pointing Out What is Wrong!

Having a disability and being able to identify this.  My son has taught me a lot about this.  It is a very touchy subject.   There is an advantage to saying I have blank.  When a person goes to Secondary Education and asking for the help that is needed means naming your disability.
Consider these things about having to say I have blank.  How many people like being singled out?  Do you want to be known for being different or having a disability?  Did you want to belong to specific groups?  How many realize the peer pressure teens with disabilitiies face?  Are called stupid or dumb for going to Lab Class for help?   Going through all these issues at or during adolescent? Recall Freak Shows at the Fair and Circues?  
Many teens and people in general with a disability see themselves as being flawed.  A number of those in this population feel like naming their disability means something is wrong with them.  A few might consider themselves less than whole.  
14700002802_89652ed498_z
tm wc3
This is my son Tanner Mack Adcock.  Every time I have tried to teach him about his disability and to name it; he gets upset.  He doesn't want to be known as a person with a disability.  He is adamant he doesn't have a disability. Being in an inclusive Oklahoma History, one incentive for him to do good without any accommadations is to be able to stay in the classroom and take tests or whatever. If a child or teen goes to lab for help he might be labled as Retarded. 
Another issue I have with what is considered correct Disability Advocacy deals with having teens lead their IEP meetings.  This can be an awful amount of pressure for a teen.  What teenager really knows what they want to do? Would we consider letting those labeled "normal" lead a class?  Be in charge of more?  Actually when I taught high school Biology I had teens present a paper, be video taped and have the so called authority of teaching the class.  Their material was on my test. I gave them what I got.  Which was asking to go to the bathroom and such.  
Please understand, I believe that the interests of the teen are paramount.  I only feel that direction of the meeting needs to be left in the hands of adults and direct the teens in having a meeting that covers all the things that should be done for him.  Trust me how many teens declare a college major and end up with that being their final degree path?  More should be expected from these teens.
How many teens with disabilities go on to be successful?  How many owe that to a parent that has pushed the teen to contiue exploriong a path?  Looking at jobs and pushing the teen to continue on in career or other?
Had I to do it over, I would been less about my son saying he has autism and more about him understanding when to ask for help.  Then I would have explained more about how some people have specific needs and identified the people like President George Washington had huge spelling problems but overcame them.  I would explain that people that have challenges need assistance and by understanding that this label may mean you can overcome this with a specific thing.
Does everybody know that a Blind person needs a cane or that a cane greatly increases his/her ability to get around? search  Do we keep telling a person that is Blind to identifiy his disability or spend more time teaching him to use a cane to get around?  How much time do we spend on teaching a person that needs a wheelchair that he has a mobility disability? search-1   Or, do we concentrate on teaching him/her to use the wheelchair to get aroud?  
If I could go back and do it over; I would center my time and energy on teaching my son to grasp his needs to master challenges in life and be able to communicate that to others.  Conveying to my son the importance of being able to ask for and communicate how support is a necessity for meeting the demands of this world.   Or, somehow be more positivie in getting him to name his disabilities to be succesful in this world be where I placed my resolve with him.
I believe that being politically correct and following the trends in Disability Advocacy is less important than doing what is needed.  I failed to listen to my son in his insistent of prefering to be identified as normal or not disabled.  What I hope to convey in this post is for you to understand you the authority on your child.  Try to listen to them and find a way to do what is needed without being afraid you are doing the right or correct way.
Become confident in yourself with regard to your child.  There are no better specialists on a child than their parent or Guardian.  Please learn from my mistakes.  Instead of helping my son name his disability, I conveyed to him that he is different or that I think he there is something wrong with him.  I am sure you know this was not my intent. Raising any child is scary. Trials and life associated with raising and planning for a child with extrodinary abilities is daunting. 
If you have advice to me, disagree with my slant on this or other; commenting is crucial to boost parents or those working with this population to teach them how to do this.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Merry Christmas -N-Blessings 4 -2015

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS
REMIND US YOU ARE THE REASON FOR THE SEASON!

TANNER'S 17TH BIRTHAY

Bill with the babies: Sandie and Spike(Now in heaven)
 TANER WINNING FIRST PLACE IN 100 METER DASH SPECIAL OLYMPICS STILLWATER, OK
 MERYY CHRISTMAS
TANNER AT JUNIOR PROM 2014
 SUMMER 2014 VISTING BIG RED BARN ARCADIA, OK
 CELEBRATING TANNER'S 17TH BIRTHDAY
  CELEBRATING TANNER'S 17TH BIRTHDAY(FAVORITE AUNT TWILA MALLO)
  CELEBRATING TANNER'S 17TH BIRTHDAY


 TANNER ABOUT TO SIT FOR SENIOR PICTURES



Monday, June 2, 2014

Honesty and humor; Mom you told me women have eggs. Autistics are concrete thinkers and honsest!

Image
Image
When my son learned about biology at school he came home saying "You lied to me!"  
Starting in mid-sentence is nothing new for him when he is hyper.  This is espcially the behavior one gets from Tanner when he thinks he has been lied to by someone.  Which is worse when it is a person he trusts to level with him . Trust me I level with him to a fault.
"Okay son what are you talking about? Remember I haven't been with you all day! Take a deep breath and think about the words you want to use to tell me what I lied to you about please."  I have learned to be direct with Tanner and focus him.  This is no easy feat for a woman that Attention Defiect Disorder and traits of other disorders. 
"You told me women have eggs like chickens." Tanner says in a yes tan excited yell.
Ah, now I know what he is talking about.  I read him the book, Where Do Babies Come From?  The book uses the analogy of chicken's laying eggs.  How did I recover from this one fast?
Remember Tanner believed in what his mom told him and I also told him to respect what his teacher's taught him. He wanted an answer and fast.  
I was fast on my  feet that day.  I explained that women have eggs like chicken's but they are different in that they are liquid eggs.  I stated the book was a very easy explanation for young children but that women do have eggs like chickens they are in just a different form.
See how autsitic's are very concrete?  See how they do not like to be lied to?  Honest and concrete in their thinking, autistics can nail you if you are not careful.  
Although this is funny, let it be a word to the wise; be careful and ready for those questions later on from stories and explanations you use.  I wasn't.  I got caught off guard and landed on my feet barely.  

Friday, February 7, 2014

A Must for Autism Parents From the NIH; Excellent Help for starting

Please do not be put off by the poetry.  I put this in as a thought provoking exercise. Explore all the things that might affect autism.  Then after you read the poem go to the NIH Sites and get free publications that explain all the poem touches on. Autism, like cancer, has so many threads and variables it is impossible to find one specific cause.  That is why we must explore all threads.
Autism? Simple answers? No! Here is
Sandra’s try at an explanation.
Autism has good graces.
Visit upon us to bless upon.
Doesn’t mean one shouldn’t ask,
“Why? What? When? Where and how?”
God could have intended
You being intentioned in the unhinging of the process.
Vaccination’s that is the key!
Say many with adamation!
I agree for them it could be,
A factor, insult that hit on.
Pharmacist in me says, the study was too small to make it a hallmark.
Flip the coin, drug makers threw around money, plus shouted out!!
Next, a group says environment
Causes problems no doubt.
Environmental insult.
Yep, that is why my child is shut into autism.
Remember here, environmental can be
From chemicals & diseases stalking inside to make their stand.
From, things like maybe Grandpa’s Agent Orange,
To a baby’s hospital stay due to RSV!
May yet wave
The Genetics Flag.
Throw into this mix, I will; smaller families, often an only child
That insists to be totally plugged into away from others.
Oh, how simple it would be
One answer, if could only twas or could be.
Yet, still I want to pose
Older parents, sperms and eggs as a contribution variable.
Not a reason not to conceive!
But to be aware more defects, mutations with age do occur.
Can one really say,
One cause is for autism?
Look at cancer! Common threads
There, still many different scenarios.
Genetics predispose, environmental assaults,
Turns on gene with a society that is ripe in culture and age of parents?
Yet, it matters!
No, it doesn’t matter!
Sound so crazy?
Yes, to help. No because we love and deal with it no matter what!
We learn what can and must be done.
But better realize the blame game must stop.
One answer might be cause in 1% of cases ( just me thinking),
Reality is autism is complex.
Complex, autism really is!
Yet, then is simple too.
Reaching out is what I want to do.
Remember right answers lead to correct therapy n treatments!
Wrong guesses and blame may only
Lead to burying data and wrong wizardly haphazard disasters.
Science, true keeps an open mind!
God is the first and Ultimate Scientist.
Together are we able
To do and can do n be our best.
In some ways the riddle of autism
Is not to be solved!
God means us to be
Who we are as he made us!
Change is something
All of us must do.
Adapting to you and others
Is being kind.
Let us not get behind
Stay in the forefront.
Doing out best to unlock the riddle
As much in prayer; God intends us to do!
I am sure by helping
We learn God’s lessons.
Helping those with autism
I bet could be a society improvement, God intends us to do.
No answer complete do I have;
Except my son is a blessing some may say in disguise!
God we will accept your answers.
Thank you God! Amen!
This post will not be long.  First, let me give you this site url in case you choose to read no futher.  You can wander around and see what is important to you.
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/autism-spectrum-disorders-pervasive-developmental-disorders/index.shtml#part8
This site is marvelous at giving basic information on autism.  There is a free "Parent's Guide to Autism Spectrum Disorder's."
On the site you will find headings listed below;
  • What is Autism Spectrum Disorder?
  • Causes
  • Signs and Symptoms
  • Who is At Risk
  • Diagnosis
  • Treatments
  • Living With
  • Clinical Trials
There are more publications, plus they are available in spanish.  
I hope this is helpful; my goal is to inform with correct information.  There is so much misinformation out there

Friday, January 24, 2014

Disability Doesn't Have To Be Debilitating

dad mom
Disability doesn't have to be debilitating.   Disability only means finding a different approach or way around life's curves.   One must find a way to get to the end of the road by hopping, using a cane, wheelchair or being carried by God.
How many people without arms have learned to drive, paint, write or other with their feet?  Technolgy has made it
easier for us now more than ever before in history.  What is stopping you from going forward?  What is stopping you from helping
your son, daughter, grandaughter, student, or patient?  Do you make excuses for them?  Do you let the stagnate?  High
expectations will help them reach their full potential.
My husband and I have gone head to head on these questions over and over.  I tend to be the pusher and my
husband the "Disney Dad."  That is all well and good if you have a child that can reach his full potential through learning
from others.  A special needs child or differently abled child needs even sterner goals and directions in my opinon.
My son is an only child.  There are no close relatives that can monitor his progress or look in on him once his parents are gone.  He will be on his
own once my husband and I die.  My son has shown me over and over he is capable. Go and get a copy of Wanda
Draper's book, "YOUR CHILD IS SMARTER THAN YOU THINK!"  She is an internationally know Child Development
Specialist.
Expectations are what you will get from your children.  My son can wash his clothes, vacuum, unload the
diswasher, or baically any household chore.  When it comes to mowing the yard or other chore that deals with a male
oriented task ( my husband interfered on me showing him); my son, Tanner, is at a lose as how to proceed.
Do you know why my son can do the things I mentioned above?  I showed him how to do them.  You can do this too.
Now I will insert the story of an 85 year old premie child that wasn't supposed to be according to her doctor's when
she was born and through a few life events.  My mother, Dorothy Mallo, was born early before the fullterm of a
pregnancy.  One way to give you an idea of how small she was is to tell you they used my grandfather's hankerchiefs for
diapers because nothing else seemed to fit.  Dorothy was born with a club foot and the growth in one leg had to be
stopped because one leg had stopped growing.
Dorothy had many surgeies at the Shriner's Hospital's.  This meant spending a year away from home.  Dorothy
often had to walk to school on crutches.  Did it ever occur to her or her family she was disabled and completely debilitated?
Apparently not!
Dorothy went on to graduate from high school and then on to Secretary College (which now I understand would be
the equivalent of an Associates Degree).  Dorothy continued to work, marry, have four children and do many things
that any normal person did.
How come these issues didn't beat her down?  What did Dorothy do that many others would not?  What is the
formula for keeping your disabilites from making you debilitated?
Could it be attitude?  Your family support system?  I feel these are part of the answer.  I also know it has to do
with the times.  I think society makes more excuses for people with disabilites and has lowered expectations.  They give
the lowest of jobs to these kids on Individual Educational Plans sometiimes; and on Employee Plans with Voccational Rehab plans.
Remember Dorothy the next time you let your disability hold you back.  My mom has never let her disabilities stop
her from doing anything she wanted to do in life.  I hold her up as an example to many.
*****This is the first appearance of this Blog Post in any medium. If you see it reposted....It was posted here @ Bloggy moms.com first.